...And You Thought The Firemen Were Hot

I preface this statement with my apologies to Mrs. Dart & Mrs. Yamashiroya. But I must say that you are both married to some incendiary quality hotties.

Yowsa!

Among the usual suspects at yesterday’s Gay Pride Parade were the delectable Sheriff of Cook County, Tom Dart and 23rd District Chicago Police Commander Gary Yamashiroya.

When did those who were sworn to serve and protect get so blazingly hot?

For disclosure’s sake, I have met Commander Yamashiroya as he and I know some of the same peeps back from my old ‘hood. He doesn’t seem like the ass kicking, name taking blue collar image you’d get of a Chicago cop.

From what the peeps have told me he seems to be measured, fair and an all around good guy.

He’s not a boozer, he doesn’t have a rep as being an asshole---‘cause the last person you ever want to meet is a cop with an attitude problem and you don’t hear about him being a skirt chaser.

Frankly, its cops like that who give the Chicago Police Department a good name.

Then of course that handsome mug don’t hurt either.

There he was, marching and waving with his lovely wife and young daughter. Always lean with a little bit of a tan.

A hot man who loves his wife and child and doesn’t try to kill them---Go figure.

In my limited view of the world there is nothing more attractive than happily married men.

No I’m not one of those skanks who sets her sights on the brass ring just out of her reach but rather it gives me hope that nice marriageable, non-commitment phobic, straight men do exist.

Was that our loud? I’m sorry---just step over all of that baggage I just dropped and we’ll continue.

There’s just something about a man who loves his wife and family that is very tantalizing. The irony is that, well---he’s married. So the chances of the hot man ever being that good to me is zero.

I know it’s warped but I suppose the grass always looks greener on the other side.

At least until you fall into the toilet and get the vapor lock of death around you ass because your husband left the seat up.

I suppose the hotness might wear off at that particular moment.

But boy howdy Sheriff Dart almost makes a sister want to go out and break the law.

I strongly suggest getting an honest to God look at that man in person. You’ll thank me later.

I was not aware that the good citizens of Cook County put eye candy in office.

Silly me I vote based on people’s record as it pertains to the office that they’re seeking, not their looks. But if I did Sheriff Dart would have won hands down.

Now it’s easy for me to extol the virtues of hot men while I sit anonymously (for the most part) behind a computer screen. The funny part is if I were standing next to them at a cocktail party I’m sure I’d make an ass out myself.

I am still very much the dorky sixteen year old girl who still can’t make small talk with the boy of my choice.

Now I’m many things, shy and under confident aren’t two of them. I am so the captain of my ship that I can put the wind in my own sails.

Nonetheless it never fails to surprise me that a person who can talk the talk (always) AND walk the walk (mostly), has not one word to say when a hottie walks in the room.

Go figure?

So if the good Commander, the Sheriff and I were having a chat I’d probably be giggling my way through the whole conversation.

Oh---and add some lip biting to boot.

I told you I’m a dork.

So I float on the outer peripheries, admiring the law enforcement man candy from afar.

Mrs. Dart and Mrs. Yamashiroya, do you ladies realize how lucky you are?

Drag Queens & Politicians & Homosexuals---Oh My!

What is the world coming to when you see the Republican nominee for governor sitting on a float in the gay pride parade?

My first reaction was to shield the eyes of the child closest to me.

Forget the transsexual “women” who are far prettier than me.

Half naked, over baked muscle boys in barely there shorts don’t even raise my eyebrows anymore.

A Republican nominee for governor---that’s something to talk about.

But I digress…

My weekend was spent not hating my developer but rather in search of fun and frolic. I took a short hop up to Minneapolis to watch the Cubs get their ass handed to them.

Then early on Sunday I flew back to Chicago, dropped my stuff off at a friend’s house and settled in for the parade.

If I didn’t know exactly how much I’d been drinking I would have swore that I was hallucinating.

I saw our sitting governor pressing the flesh. Believe everything you hear---his hair doesn’t move---for any reason.

Then a few floats later I saw Judy Barr Topinka, the Republican nominee for governor and almost passed out from the sight.

Just a little background for you folks---in order for politicians to appease a broad range of potential voters, they tend to send people to march for them in a parade instead of showing up themselves.

I’ve never seen Mayor Daley march in a gay pride parade yet he has been well represented in years past.

But when actual politicians start showing up you know something is afoot.

I guess I should of recognized it when the straight girl with boyfriend parade spectator ratio exploded in years past.

And the brouhaha with the display window on Halsted street should have been a red flag.

What clinched it was the entrance of a dueling pianos float from Sluggers.

This is obviously a play for the cabaret set. Perhaps Sluggers’ management is hoping that since it’s a sports bar as well that it may bring in some of the gay jocks.

Apparently the emergence of the gay sports bar Crew has people at Sluggers realizing the potential revenue from gay athletes.

I stopped going to Sluggers after Cubs’ games in my early thirties as their Sam Adams from the tap tastes like ass.

Trust me I drink enough of it so I should know.

The voting population at large may be split on gay marriage but at least one thing is clear in corporate and political America---the gay vote and gay dollar are very much in vogue.