Bullshit

Per my Twitter post, the parties at the Metropolitan still continue.

You know the thing that absolutely kills me?

Is that these parties wouldn’t happen if this facility was located in Hyde Park.

Or even next to Rev. Finney’s home.

For those of you who don't know, the Metropolitan is housed in the former Christ Apostolic Church which moved to Bronzeville several years ago. Public records indicate that the building is still owned by the The Woodlawn Organization which is closely identified with the good Reverend.

I’ll bet money that if this foolishness happened in his neighborhood, that his neighbors would have him tarred and feathered.

Yet for the sake of the almighty dollar, my block has to play host to groups of people who cannot seemingly act like respectful human beings.

Kind readers, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again---Whoever is booking these parties is courting disaster in so many ways it boggles the mind.

This facility is a lawsuit waiting to happen.

Security and/or supervision are non-existent.

Seemingly anyone who has the money can rent the facility.

Guidelines---What’s that?

It also seems that a majority of the groups that patronize the Metropolitan also attract a crowd that believes it’s a good idea to throw their empty liquor bottles and trash on the parkway.

Saturday morning the ‘hood looked green and pastoral, Sunday morning it looked like unadulterated shit.

It looked like a trash hurricane rolled through this bitch and deposited every liquor and beer bottle advertised on billboards saturating this side of town.

Now you would think that Mt. Carmel’s lawn crew would pick up the trash as they mow the lawn.

Unfortunately that is not the case.

Instead of picking up the trash, they simply throw it in the street compounding the problem.

Bottles break, gutters are blocked with debris, when it rains the street becomes a swamp.

Delightful. Simply fucking delightful.

So the question is this: Rev. Finney, why is this allowed to happen?

Oh yeah---

Have someone pickup the trash that is all over the Metropolitan’s lawn. It looks horrible.

Restless

It seems that my fellow Woodlandites are none too happy with the shenanigans and foolishness going on around 61st Street/South Campus area.

If you didn’t know, South Campus is the new name for that part of Woodlawn just south of the Midway (60th Street). Commonly recognized as the dividing line between University of Chicago and Woodlawn.

In the past the University of Chicago specifically told their students and faculty not to go south of the Midway. While that stance has been eradicated, the perception persists that once you cross that boundary, your physical being and immortal soul are in peril.

Nonetheless, those brave souls who have done just that and decided to make their homes in Woodlawn are pissed.

Potholes and gunfire just don’t seem to be their cup of tea.

As a matter of fact, one new blogger is simply furious at The Woodlawn Organization.

So much so that his whole blog is dedicated to shine a light on what he perceives as mismanagement of the subsidized housing managed by the organization.

Oooh Whee…

South side stand up.

Cock Starz, Part 2

All quiet on the western front.

There wasn't a wayward car, stripper or over stimulated party girl in sight Sunday night.

Methinks the message may have FINALLY gotten through.

Club Honey

I received this text on Saturday from one of my neighbors:

"I think there is something going on at the Metro Club. Gave some ladies directions to 'Club Honeys' at 1445 East XXth Street."

Yet when I came home the street wasn't mobbed with cars.

Odd.

The reason made itself apparent when I was walking to the train yesterday morning:



Is this lasting progress?

Cock Starz

Exotic revues abound in Woodlawn but common sense seems to be in short supply.

It makes one ponder if the social service organization that owns the building knows about this foolishness?

Site Manager

For those of you who’ve been long time readers already know I wasn’t going to let this Metropolitan foolishness fade to black.

In fact, since I seemingly couldn’t get any answers that I needed; I did what every resourceful, tax paying Chicagoan should do-----I called the police.

Well not 911 but the 3rd District CAPS office.

I started chatting with one nice police officer who then referred me to another nice police officer.

I’m gonna be honest with you, I thought this was shaping up to be a pass the buck type of moment.

Fortunately for me that wasn’t the case.

Everyone over at the 3rd District CAPS office has been extremely responsive; so much so that I heard via the grapevine the nice people at TWO recently had a chat with the police.

Now I wasn’t there at this little pow wow but from what I understand the word has come down---ixnay on the parties.

Apparently (and allegedly) no one over at the main TWO office knew anything about the shenanigans on 65th Street.

But they know now.

From what I heard, the site manager took the brunt of the blame in the conversation between the police and the TWO.

While I know it sounds mushy and girlish, I hope he or she doesn’t loose their job---more than likely they won’t. That wasn’t my intention.

My intentions were two fold: (1) Find out who’s making the party decisions at the Metropolitan and (2) Have them understand why it’s not appropriate to book a series of teen parties in a residential neighborhood.

Or strippers for that matter.

So at this point, it appears that things very well may be settling down.

But you never know.

I’ll pass the word along to the neighbors---Vigilance from everyone is required.

Frying Pan Into The Fire

It appears that the battle was won but the outcome of the war is severely muddled.

While the Friday night Juke Jams were shut down, the Metropolitan quickly rebounded by booking a “for ladies only” strip show in its space last week.

How do I know?

Easy---I simply asked a few of the ladies pouring out of the cars parked on my street.

They were all too eager to chat about where they were going and the type of show that was going on inside.

As a matter of fact, it seemed that tickets could be purchased in advance so there had to be some type of publicity or word of mouth. If I wasn’t in so much pain from my knee injury earlier in the week, I would have limped down there to see if I could have bought a ticket and seen the show.

More on my personal reenactment of the ice capades later.

These latest incidents reinforce my belief that whoever’s in charge at the Metropolitan is making some questionable decisions regarding the rental of their space.

Furthermore, I have serious questions about proper licensing and zoning issues.

Now I haven’t thoroughly checked everything out, but I believe our little piece of paradise is zoned residential, not commercial---but then of course I could be wrong.

Nonetheless, it’s always a good idea to run an party space in the same building as a substance abuse recovery program so what do I know?

Interestingly enough I did manage to find out that when one throws a large party or one where money an admission is being charged; it is the responsibility of the promoter or the host to make sure that the venue in question has all of the proper permits, licenses, safety features and apparatuses.

If the venue doesn’t have all of its ducks in a row, a responsible promoter would be crazy to stage his or her parties at the venue for fear of a possible lawsuit.

So caveat emptor when buying your ticket to these events. The party may be poppin’ but a panicked crowd of people in a venue that may or may have its permits, licensing and inspection by the fire department is a place that I have no desire to be.

Frankly speaking, that scenario is quite a possible with a novice or negligent party promoter.

I know what you’re thinking---Let’s not even talking about security and parking.

So while it would be easy for me to piss and moan about an impending disaster across the street, in actuality I don’t really know what’s exactly going on.

I don’t know who’s running the show.

I don’t know who’s promoting and hosting most of the parties.

I don’t know what type of setup the Metropolitan has or if our little hoody hoo is zoned for such a venture.

I don’t even know if neighborhood input would be welcomed or even considered.

But I’m sure as hell gonna find out.

Phyrric

Calls were made.

Concerns were raised.

The Juke Jame situation was assessed.

Long story short, it seems that some law enforcement types were none too pleased about an ongoing party for 14-20 year olds that they hadn't been informed about.

Discussion flourished.

But in the end the party was called off. Go figure.

A small victory for the 'hood, right?

Wrong---dead wrong.

Goodbye Juke Jam.

Hello strippers.

How Many Times Can I Invoke The Name Of Jesus In A Week?

You know what? I'm going to go and get a drink.

While doing so, I'll ponder the possible impact of this latest development on the 'hood.

Jesus take the wheel.

Institutionalized

What’s the story with our non-profit neighbors?

If you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time you know my many tales of the school across the street.

But they’re not the only institution that calls our little patch of Woodlawn home.

The former Christ Apostolic Church was located across the street from our association until they moved into their new home in 2002.

The congregation is now called Metropolitan Apostolic Community Church.

Nonetheless the old building remains—frankly I’m not sure if it belongs to the church or if it’s somehow associated with Rev. Finney’s historic T.W.O. group.

And while it’s a beautiful old building, there has been a marked decline in the curb appeal since the congregation moved.

The words minimum upkeep spring to mind.

Christmas lights from several seasons ago are still in the trees, when a storm blew through here a couple of summers ago the branches and debris weren’t cleared until months later.

Mountains of trash overflowed out of the dumpster until recently.

While all of those things can drive your neighbors to distraction, in my estimation we had bigger fish to fry with impassible sidewalks and piles of garbage across the street.

One thing at a time, yo.

I figured as soon as Mt. Carmel was on track, I’d find out whom to drop a line to so the curb appeal quotient could ratchet up a few notches.

Unfortunately about a month ago that all changed.

I notice things in our little two-block stretch of paradise. Especially since I’m located on the third floor.

So it wasn’t too difficult too notice when every last available street parking space was taken up in the late afternoon on a Saturday night.

It also wasn’t too difficult to notice when about a dozen cars were parked in the vacant lot behind our home.

But it really wasn’t difficult to notice the excessive noise and bullshit taking place on our quiet street as afternoon stretched into evening and evening stretched into the next day.

While I took note of all of this, it was my neighbor Caustic who actually got the 411 on the situation.

Not only did she get the 411 but also dialed 911.

Squad cars and paddy wagon arrived not long thereafter.

It seems that the space is now being rented out for events. Which on it’s face is great, but if you don’t have a special use permit for the space that’s not so good.

Furthermore, if the people you’re renting the space to are either knuckleheads or disrespectful of our neighborhood---that’s a problem.

There are so many “what if’s.”

What if a promoted event exceeds capacity?

What if an emergency happens inside of the building? Do people know how to safely exit?

Those are just the first two questions in the front of my mind. Of course just by asking those questions others such as private security, rental guidelines and community standards pop into my head.

It appears that, at least on the surface, that the rental guidelines may need some tightening.

Now I loves me a good party. Hell I’ve been known to throw a few.

But I maybe have three or four a year---that was before I got laid off ---I always notified my downstairs neighbor in enough time so if they didn’t want 40-50 people walking over their heads they could make other plans.

Plus if you’re a guest in my house, you know you better act like you got some sense or a beat down will be coming your way.

I have to take too much shit outside of my home to put up with any foolishness inside my walls.

From what’s been seen so far, we’re not optimistic about the quality of events that may be held in the future.

So as a service to the decision maker(s) who green light the event rentals, you may want to use the few examples below as a guide:

Drop it like it’s hot rump shaker contest---No.

Eastern Star Five Point Tea---Yes.

Traveling male strip troupe featuring “Chocolate Thunder”---No.

State convention of the Missionary Society---Yes.

Any event that’s promoted with the phase, “Dress code strictly enforced, no hats or gym shoes.”---No
Community Meetings---Yes

With all of the foolishness that’s been going on lately, who wants to rattle the Tiger’s cage?

Let’s keep the warm weather months as drama free as possible.

Big Brothers

So the University of Chicago is attempting to reconcile with the Woodlawn community.

At this point the overtures have been met with mixed results.

From what I’ve seen, the University is talking a good game but it still seems that the true spirit of partnership isn’t there.

But on the other hand the methods of the past haven’t worked either.

When the epic battle between The Woodlawn Organization (TWO) and the University commenced in the 60’s, TWO won the battle but as those of us who live here can attest to, they lost the war.

Not only did Woodlawn lose a great deal of its population but from what I understand a majority of it’s retail as well.

Frankly, since I’m not old enough to remember Woodlawn as it was I have to rely on books, articles and the old timers who were around to see such things.

Nonetheless, things got bad for the neighborhood---really bad.

So while the University didn’t expand their campus further south, the entrenched powers that be turned from social activism to social services.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m all for helping.

But my version of help is providing a vehicle to affordable home ownership, not affordable housing.

Because as long as you have a landlord, it’s my opinion that you’re not quite the captain of your own ship---I’m just sayin’…

Whatever the case, it would appear that the old way of running things isn’t working.

Abandoned buildings, Empty lots, high crime, few local employment opportunities (that provide a living wage), low home ownership and lack of retail do not an attractive neighborhood make.

So it with cautious optimism that the overtures from the University are being received; if the old ways aren’t working, then perhaps it’s time to look at some new ones.

Survey?

I went and took the T.W.O. Neighbor survey on Saturday and quickly realized that it may not have been targeted for the working professional.

Then of course I may be wrong.

A vast majority of the questions were aimed at pinpointing employment skill sets.

Do you have a trade? Have you ever been a home health care worker? Do you have office skills?

In light of my looming unemployment, these questions are very pertinent.

Nonetheless I was surprised at not only the skill set questions but the questions concerning the neighborhood quality of life issues, general quality of life issues and affordable housing.

When a list of questions was ticked off about neighborhood concerns and retail and/or services wasn’t among them I found it odd.

I finished the survey and received a $10.00 Target gift card.

That came right on time as I just ran out of laundry detergent.

I mentioned to my friend that in my opinion it seemed that none of the questions were geared toward professionals or the non-existent retail presence in Woodlawn.

He listened and said, “That’s because they want to know about the potential pool of workers in the neighborhood.”

I sat stunned by his assessment.

When I asked why this survey was commissioned and what it hoped to achieve, I was given a stock answer of “community improvement.”

How this information was going to improve the community or what was going to be done with it wasn’t clearly defined or explained.

In fact I couldn’t get any information about the services that the T.W.O. was running out of the former all girls’ Catholic school next door to my building or a contact name for that matter.

When I commented that since Rev. Finney’s church left a few years ago, the upkeep of the property has been questionable at best, I was referred to my alderman and city services.

If you’re thinking what I was thinking at the time---I was a bit amazed by the answer as well.

And now that I’m thinking about it---I didn’t get a chance to interface with my neighbors.

As you came in and signed the sign-in sheet, the survey was administered by a T.W.O. volunteer/representative so you never got to kibbutz with anyone else.

What’s the point of holding a neighbor open house if you don’t get to say hey to the neighbors?

Very curious, no?

So it looks like T.W.O. may not be advocating for a dry cleaner for the eastern part of Woodlawn anytime soon.

Woodlawn Alert

The Woodlawn Organization (T.W.O.) is holding a Neighbor to Neighbor Open House on Saturday, August 18th, Tuesday, August 21st & Thursday, August 23.

Billed as an information-exchange gathering, community residents are encouraged to learn about T.W.O. and also participate in the Woodlawn Survey.

Personally I think this may be a great way for people that have been living next door or around the corner from each other to actually meet and to also reassess our rapidly changing community’s demographic.

If we’re lucky perhaps T.W.O. will persuade a cleaner to relocate or open in the eastern section of the ‘hood.

Can you tell that my fine garments are piling up by the door?

Dates, times & locations of the various open houses are below:


Saturday, August 18th
12:00-4:00 P.M.
1445 East 65th Street, Chicago, IL
Jackson Parkside Apartments 6040 South Harper, Chicago, IL
Berry Manor Apartments, 737 East 69th Street, Chicago, IL


Tuesday, August 21st
4:30-7:30 P.M.
1445 East 65th Street, Chicago, IL
Jackson Parkside Apartments 6040 South Harper, Chicago, IL
Berry Manor Apartments, 737 East 69th Street, Chicago, IL
WECDC, 950 East 61st Street, Chicago, IL


Thursday, August 23rd
4:30-7:30 P.M.
1445 East 65th Street, Chicago, IL
Jackson Parkside Apartments 6040 South Harper, Chicago, IL
WECDC, 950 East 61st Street, Chicago, IL
Harris Chicago Park District, 62nd & Drexel, Chicago, IL