The Loo

As you kind folks may be able to tell, I’m enthralled with most things having to do with London.

Save for one---their toilets.

It seems that the handle to flush is on the other side of the tank. Now that wouldn’t usually be a problem but when you’re in a public bathroom performing a modified iron cross so your ass doesn’t touch the seat and you’re trying to flush, I can tell you from experience that you may fail miserably.

It’s kind of like a person who puts their toilet paper on under the roll and has suddenly takes up residence with someone who put their tp on over the roll.

The classic under roller vs. over roller conflict.

It’s the same level of dismay when you discover that the handle is on the “wrong side” of the tank.

Ditto that for the “courtesy flush.”

I’m not quite sure how the Brits pull it off but I just gave up and began traveling with a pack of matches.

It’s not worth dislocating my shoulder to spare me a few moments of embarrassment. After all I did say that my shit does stink.